Favorite Status Updates of 2013

Jan:

My beautiful little angel has arrived. Took me 4 pushes and she was out and in our arms. Such a smooth easy birth and instant skin to skin bonding for almost an hour!! Amazing finish to our "having children" chapter of our lives. She is sleeping with a full tummy and I am about to nap. Hunter's attempts at the words "Fork" and "Shirt" have come out a bit...well...pg-13. We will work on it. — with Jason Oestreich. I am 26 years old and I STILL won't stand next to my bed for any long period of time, for fear that the monsters under my bed will grab my ankles. What's wrong with me?? I have children..shouldn't I be grown out of the monster fear by now??! Lol Feb: You know you're a mom when you can burp a 1 month old and catch your 2 year old falling off the couch with your feet at the same time. Hunter yelled to me from his fort "mommy come here to cuddle!!" Awwww I don't fit though buddy. March: I can't smile at Emma while she's nursing bc she stops eating to smile back and dribbles milk everywhere. It is stinking cute though. Hehehe. It's so funny hearing Hunter say things that I had no idea I say all the time..like "Hmmm" whenever he looks in a cupboard, or "It's ok Emma" in a gentle tone when she cries, or "We're home!" when we pull in the drive way. He has also decided that Downton Abbey is "Mommy show." And copies my dance moves. Lol Hunter just woke up an exclaimed over the baby monitor that he farted..and then started laughing. LOL!! That kid.... Hunter and Emma both got shots today. broke my heart when Hunter cried saying "Tickles!! Tickles!!" I was like no baby it hurts, and it's ok. He was fine in 5 mins when he saw the train in the lobby. Haha. Emma was fine in less time and back to sleep again. When Emma is on tummy time Hunter lays beside her saying "Go Emma go!" Then when she lifts her head and turns it to the other side, we cheer for her and shower her with kisses. Am I the only one who gets Jumanji flashbacks when I see a bee try to get into my car through the windshield??!! Just walkin down the street with a sandwich, my Micky purse and a 40cal. NBD. The Gold of Felder by Corinne Perera (eBook) - Lulu www.lulu.com My book is officially PUBLISHED!!!!! It's a downloadable ebook on Lulu. Please share this with your friends!! Being a mommy means getting up with child number two the second that child number one falls asleep, it's watching Cars2 18 times and still laughing at the same parts together. It's swinging around in the grad in bare feet and then immediately regretting it together as we fall sick to the ground. It's sacrificing lace bras for nursing ones, and tan lines for stretch marks. It's the constant buzz in the back of our mind when we are away from our babies, wondering if they are ok. It's repeating back to a two year old exactly what he said so he can stop saying it 500 times. It's snuggles, and "thank you mommy"s and "I yuv you" as you shut the door. I thank God I'm a mommy.. It's a tough calling, but a blessing indeed. That awkward moment when the cashier hands back your credit card and your fingers touch... Uhm... I'm married, April: The other day: Hunter wasn't eating his dinner at my parents house, so I turn to see my brother knife handing my son, for non marines that means pointing his hand at Hunter and speaking sternly.. Hunter proceeds to slowly lean forward and LICK Andrew's knife hand..thereby diffusing it totally. Lol! We all cracked up. Commonly used phrases in the Oestreich household: "Don't put Marines in your sisters crib." "I yuh you", "get your hand out of your diaper please." "*high pitched scream*" "NO!!" "Excuse me young man?!" Aaaaand last but not least "Hunter use a Kleenex, not my shirt." My son just brought me a dandelion..but in his eyes it was a rose. His face was smiling and eager to hand it to me, so I reacted as if it were a bouquet. "Here mommy!" And I cried at his generosity and sweet spirit. Hunter: "Damnit." Me: "Hunter don't say that..say Oh no." Hunter: "Oh damnit." Me: sighhhh Andrew came over to keep me company and the following hilarious conversation ensued.. Andrew: So I was crocheting yesterday.. (Me Cracking up) :I'm sorry...were you serious? Andrew: Ya. Me: (Still laughing) Andrew: I'd appreciate it if you'd stop laughing at me. Me: I'm sorry I'm just picturing you crocheting at the gym on the squat rack. Andrew: Don't be ridiculous Corinne.. there's not nearly enough time in between sets. I cant finish a whole chain in that amount of time. Me:(Laughing with my forehead on the counter and crying.) HAHAHAHAHA! — with Andrew Toasty Perera. Hunter ran up to Jason and shot him with a squirt gun while Jason was washing dishes..Jason promptly fell to the ground "wounded" and then let hunter shoot him before stealing the water gun and shooting back from the kitchen floor. I love my family. — with Jason Oestreich. I always dread when Jason Oestreich leaves for work.. I miss him and get lonely at the house all day. As a Marine wife, I then promptly smack myself in the metaphorical face and say "It's not a deployment you civilian sounding hussy!" Lol Sooo it was bound to happen at some point, with one of my children.. I walked into Hunters room today to find that he had reached into his poopy diaper and painted his face, arms, legs, bed, sheets, and walls with his poop. Oh. My. Dear. Lord... All I could say was "Oh my goodness..." and "DONT MOVE!!" and "DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!!" May: Picked up some dinner tonight with the kids at the Mc Donald's drive through.. On my way home I drove past a homeless man who was sitting on the corner looking defeated. He didn't have a sign. He looked hungry, and very dirty. I got about a mile before I couldn't shake that holy spirits voice tellin me to turn around. So I did. I gave him my hot dinner and soda, said I hope God blesses him. He said "He just did." And I smiled and walked back to my car. The homeless man sat frozen, just staring at the bag I food for a minute before opening it to eat it with tears in his eyes. I have never felt so full in my life. My son calls Blueberries "Boobies", so at the drive through today all the guy taking my order can hear is my 2 year old screaming "I want boobies!!!! More boobies!!!!" Awwwkward. That moment when a car pulls up at a red light next to you so you roll down your window to see a Navy Officer in full uniform and he says "so what does the OFP in your bumper sticker stand for?" Uhhh "it stands for own fucking program.......sir." Lol Hunter didn't want to open his mouth to eat dinner so I said "You better open your mouth young man or the movie goes off." So he starts yelling "Obama!! Obama!!! Obama!!" Sorry kid, president Obama is not going to rescue you from eating your dinner. (I explained recently that our Presidents Obama, Bush, Clinton etc are here to help us.. I guess he thought that meant from eating peas and carrots too.) Me: Hunter did you put a booger in my tea?? Hunter: Mmhmm. Me: Gross. Hunter: (Maniacal laughter) While watching my daughter snuggle with Jason Oestreich, I got emotional and started tearing up, to which my husband said "Hey..suppress that emotion." And hunter looked up from my lap and goes "ya mommy suppress motion!" Lol ok MEN..sorry for acting so female. My 2 year old son just climbed onto the sofa beside me, put his arm around my shoulder and pulled my head down, kissed me on my forehead and said " I love you little mama." And then turned to watch TV with his arm still around me. Words cannot express my joy and love for that child. I just used my moms line from when I was a kid... "The more you ask, the more the answer is going to be no." My child brain heard this and thought, oh no I better stop asking bc the quantity of the "no" is increasing!! As if it were on a quantitative spectrum. Lol I wonder if Hunter thinks that when I say it now. June: I am so excited!! My surrogacy packet was approved and I now begin the process of being matched with a couple. I have started my journey down the path of surrogacy!! Can't wait to bring a happy deserving couple the joy of a baby. It's been a perfect day! Finished all the chores, stocked the kitchen with food, played in the sprinkler with Hunter and enjoyed black berries and an ice cold Pepsi. July: Hunter: Mommy I want a bar!! (Granola bar) Me: Start over. Hunter: Mommy I want a bar please. Me: ok but I need to finish feeding Emma first. Hunter: No!! Me: Hunter you need to be patient. Hunter: I tell your father!! Me: Pretty sure my dad would agree with me Hunter. Lol — with John Perera. Hunter was laying on the couch with his arms behind his head while I cleaned the den, I knocked the remote off the couch an hunter says "Damnit mommy you dropped the remote." I said "Excuse me??" And he sat up and said it slowly "Damnit..mommy..you dropped..the remote." Ya....the timeout chair got nice and warm. Another gem from Hunter tonight. He was going through my purse while I was cooking dinner and yelled for him to stop, he kept going, I yelled again. He kept going so I came out to talk to him and he ran to the couch. In the middle of my "you need to stop when I ask the first time" lecture, he turns his head, closes his eyes and starts to snore. Lord have mercy, my eyes got so wide. My inner monologue sounded something like this "Oh HELL no!" Tonight while cooking dinner, Hunter snuck around the counter and shot me with his Buzz Lightyear gun, so I grabbed the nearby squirt gun and returned fire. He died very dramatically on the couch, and then the table and then the ground followed by some twitching an a tongue sticking out. He is so my kid. August: That moment when three police officers clear your broken into house, and then come out and say "Well we thought your house was ransacked, but then we realized you just had kids." Thanks officer....thanks. — feeling annoyed. Tomorrow night I meet the couple from Indonesia that I will hopefully be a surrogate for!! I am nervous, excited, anxious and so emotional already. This will be quite a journey. Today Hunter refused to listen to me while I was lecturing him, so I raised me voice. He turned his head and says very calmly "Mommy calm down. Breeeaath breaaathhh. Deep breaths." OMG I lost it, I cracked up so hard. Can you tell I say that a lot to him during his tantrums? I guess he thought I was throwing a tantrum. My anniversary toast tonight with our complimentary moscato wine... "To Infinity and beyond!" I love that our son inspired our toast tonight. Hehe You know a restaurant is going to be $$$ when it's so dark you can barely read the menu.. "Does that say 35$ or 85$ for the steak?" "I dunno...better order a chicken to be safe." Hunter came into the kitchen today while Jason and I were talking, and he had a brown paper bag slung over his shoulder like a purse and he says "buh bye! I go store!" We stopped and looked and him and said "oh ya? What are you getting?" He starts listing things off "uhm..Donald's fries, Oni cheese, grabber..I take motorcycle k?" Jason and I started cracking up and he adds "keys please." And we completely lost it with laughter. It was too cute. Just got back form the gym...uhm... I'm starving!!!!!!! I sat down to eat some mushrooms with ranch and Jason practically hurled himself across the room to knock the ranch out of my hands like Dwight in the episode of The Office with the fax from the future about the "poisoned coffee". I pretty much looked just as scared as Stanley. LOL. But really... food. I thought Hunter rubbing his hands in my hair was sweet and endearing until I realized he was wiping his macaroni and cheese goop off on me....... #mommyproblems #isit8oclockyet — feeling used. September: Today Hunter and I had our very first discussion about God. I asked if he knew who God was? (I am always interested in what children have to see without prompting because I believe they are still so fresh to this world that they retain some memory of life before here.) He pointed to his heart. I said "Yes, God lives in your heart, he's not a man, or a woman. He is a spirit, and loves you so much. Whenever mommy hugs you, God is hugging you. Whenever Mommy kisses you, God is kissing you. Isn't that neat?" He said "Ya! God is Daddy?" And I was floored... "Yes Hunter we call him Heavenly Father..because he sent us to earth to live and to grow. He isn't the daddy we know and see every day, he's a different daddy. We wont see God because God wants us to learn on our own, but sometimes we feel him, like the wind." He said "Oh..Ya." and then touched his heart again. I could feel the spirit with us.. "You feel God?" He smiled and laughed "Ya." I hugged him. "I talk to God?" he asked me. I said "You can talk to God whenever you want.. he will always listen to you, and understand. He wont always answer, and that's ok. But he is always there, loving you." He laughed and said "That's weird!" I said "Ya it is weird isn't it?" So amazing that I have these conversations with my son already.. October: Both children fell asleep on the car ride home from my Parents house in their footed PJs, to a CD I played of my songs I wrote...Hunter asked me to sing so I put on the CD and sang the harmonies. They were out like lights and carried them into their beds like cuddly sacks of flannel potatoes. Hunter: Mommy where's my nuky?? Me: I don't know, you had it last. Hunter: Well...FIND it. Me: Uh..no, it's your nuky you find it. Hunter: No YOU find it!!! And don't talk back to me again!!! Me: (The mommy look of death) Hunter: Opps...I sorry I sorry...don't know why I said that. (Smacks forehead.) Me: Mmmmhmmm Jason Oestreich dip-kissed me before he left for work today...and while I was bent over backwards laughing from the kiss, Hunter walks up with his hands on his hips and says "Stop that daddy!" HAHA! Someone got a little jealous I think. That awkward moment when you're loading the kids into the car while the gardener a stare and giggle, then realize your two year old son is wearing your neon print thong on the outside of his black jeans. "Oh my Gosh Hunter!! Stop running away..get over here!!" (Gardeners continue to giggle) Me:Jason hunny it's time to wake up..we gotta get ready for pictures at 11. Jason Oestreich: (obviously still asleep) That is a LOT of food. Me: (deciding to play along) yes it is...you better eat all of it. Jason: (points) Back to the fields woman. Me: Ugh!! (Smack) Jason: WHAT??? (Waking up) (Corinne storms out..Jason confused) November: ..and on the 8th day God created coffee, for it was obvious unto him that the people of the word after creating tiny versions of themselves would be near exhaustion from the lack of sleep during a time when teeth descend in their young. And he saw the coffee brewing, and the sighs of relief at first sip and said "It is good." Yesterday while at LAX Airport I wished at least 3 Marines a Happy Birthday. One Marine laughed and said "I'm not in uniform, how did you know I was a Marine??" He didnt have a camo pack, or a Marine shirt on.. I just knew. I said "Sir you may not be wearing a "Uniform" but the Mantel of a Marine never leaves you.. it was pretty obvious to me." And I gave him a big smile. He said "Semper Fi mama." and kept on walking. #oneforthememorybooks Hunter runs to me with every single boo boo big and small asking to me kiss it better. After a quick kiss he sighs and says "Thanks mom" and then continues to play. Today he asked me to kiss his elbow while I was in the middle of making breakfast, I got irritated, but quickly remembered that my son would not run to me for healing boo boo kisses forever and have him a bonus kiss on his cheek. Me: Uh hunter get off the computer and clean your room please. Hunter: I'm trying to do homework mom!!! Me: oh you got a big paper due or something? Hunter: (distracted) ya... Mom I can't concentrate! Me: oh jeez...sorry. Well why don't you take a study break and come help me clean. Hunter: (Heavy sigh) ok MOOOM. Since when is my 2 1/2 year old a 16 year old high schooler with attitude??? So taking three estrogen pills a day to prepare for pregnancy makes me extremely emotional and I broke down bawling in the middle of choir practice tonight singing a song about Joseph as a father with calloused hands holding a newborn Christ. Ya...sobbing people...sobbing. Like ugly cry sobbing.   December: I wasn't going to go to Church this morning bc I am NOT feeling well at all..but when I told Hunter he looked so sad and said "...oh." And heaved a sigh. Jeez kid!! So we're going and I am SITFU for my son. Lol   and thats all folks. :)

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Today a Firefighter made Hunter's day!

After Jason and I signed my surrogacy contract this morning, we decided to run into Lucky's the grocery store to pick up a few items that I forgot to grab the last time I was there. It was right next door to the Notary so we walked over. I picked out the items we needed, and noticed out of the corner of my eye, the Firefighters from the firehouse across the street were also shopping for some food to make their dinners. I made a mental not that there was probably a Firetruck outside and that I needed to point it out to Hunter on our way to the car. We got to the check out line and the firefighters were behind us. I turned around and said "Excuse me, but are you a firefighter?" He smiled and said "Yes I am." and I said "Is your truck outside?" He said "It sure is.." and I looked at Hunter wide eyed and said "Buddy there's a firetruck outside!! We can see it as we walk by to the car ok?" After I said that the firefighter said "If you'd like, he can come over and sit in the driver's seat!" I probably would have cried if I wasn't positive he would think I was nuts. That would mean the world to Hunter!! I couldn't wait to get out there and show my little buddy the truck! Daddy took Hunter over to the truck while I unloaded the groceries and carried Emma over to meet them. Hunter, my tiny Hunter was so small up there on the driver's seat, but he had the BIGGEST smile on his face. He was literally in Heaven.

He was oblivious to us as he sat up there, that is...until the firefighter asked if Hunter wanted to try on the helmet and firecoat. Oh boy...as if it couldn't get any better!! Hunter looked like he was swimming in that jacket, but he was so happy.

He wouldn't stop talking about it all day. I don't know if that firefighter will ever realize just how much that mean to my little Hunter. Today was awesome.

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Why I don't have my $h&% together..and it's perfectly ok.

Tonight I made Shepherds Pie for dinner. It looked PERFECT. I snapped a quick picture and put a filter on it to brighten it a bit, and the background was my stove. The crust of the mashed potatoes were a golden brown that would have made the spirit of my 1940's housewife Great-grandmother proud! It certainly showed nicely. (Tasted good too,) but let me tell you what you didn't see in the picture. My sink was piled high with dishes from yesterday's dinner and midnight snacks. My floor was littered with a couple potato peels that my 9 month old daughter was "practicing her small motor skills" on (as pinterest would put it.) My 2 1/2 year old son was sitting at the table eating an entire bowl of cous cous with a banana peel balanced on his head, the kitchen counter was stacked with unopened mail, don't even get me started on how long the wet clothes in the washer have been there, and I'm pretty sure the TV had been on all day. But my golly did that shepherds pie look perfect!!

Sometimes I am floored by how simplistic and perfect my life looks according to the posts I have on Facebook. You would think that my children slept peacefully through the night from 8pm-8am, and that every morning I am greeted with "Oh hello mommy!!" and a big hug. (OK that part is usually true..unless he's peed through his diaper and I have to change sheets..then it's more like "Mommy I wet!!") Facebook has allowed us the mask of perfection, and pinterest is what sends it viral. I started posting pictures of my messy house on an Instagram hashtag called #reallife, where I let everyone see the behind the scenes of those "perfect" photos. Did I just post an adorable picture of my smiling son? Yes. Did you see the puddle of spilled sippy cup milk that he was sitting in slowly drain into the recesses of my leather couch never to be seen or heard from again? No.

Confession: I do not have my proverbial $h%# together...and that's ok.

Don't get me wrong. I love pinterest with it's many recipes calling for "only 5 ingredients!" or the post about how to turn random furniture crap into chalk boards (why do I want to accidentally scratch my nails on that again?) But it's time for women to stop comparing ourselves to each other and start showing the realities. Guess what...I wont judge you for posting a picture of your playroom with dumped toys everywhere. That's what a playroom is supposed to look like!! I laugh when I go to peoples houses and they have designated special boxes for cars, and special boxes for stuffed animals, and special boxes for blocks. Really? You make your kid sit there and sort all of that? Or do you just do it for him? In the words of Sweet Brown "Aint nobody got time fo that!!" I cant sit here and sort my son's army men! I need to go rescue my daughter from eating the foam letter my son just peeled off of one of his toys! If you find time to clean your house, cook immaculate dinners that are hot when your husband gets home, bathe two kids, feed them and have them dressed for bed by 8pm every day you my friend are a rarity. If you do all of those things AND work a full time job, you're a freaking GOD.

So to the women out there who put Mickey Mouse on while they cook dinner, who play with their children on the floor and smother them with kisses instead of washing those dishes right away, I applaud you. We are doing the best we can, and that is ok. Our kids won't remember the dishes in the sink, or the mail strewn about the counter, but they will remember that story you read, or that night where you let them snuggle in YOUR bed for 30 mins as a treat. Those are the memories that will last a lifetime. Your house can be clean when they move out to college...those days are coming faster than we think.

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Gratitude..joy...disbelief.

I have been truly humbled by the grace and love of friends who have come to assist Jason and I as we seek to afford Jason's recovery time after surgery. There are not many occasions where I have been rendered completely speechless, but tonight I sat with my hands over my mouth and tears in my eyes. We have not met our end goal.. but 900.00 will still help out tremendously and we are grateful for every ounce of help we receive. We are blessed. Thank you. Thank you...Thank you.


http://www.gofundme.com/4rtz0w

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Crying down Highway 237..

This morning I packed the kids in the car to head to Thursday morning work shop at church. Thursday morning workshop is a group of ladies young and older who gather as a supportive bunch to talk and chat while working on various crafts. We happen to be in high gear getting ready for the Annual Craft Fair we host every October to raise funds for the United Methodist Women. I enjoy going every Thursday with the kids because it's a chance for me to sit and chat with my Aunt and Grandmothers, and all of the other women I have to come to know in my lifetime of growing up at FUMC. So this morning I packed the diaper bag, made sure I had three diapers for each kid, re-stocked the Marine corps cami print diaper wipes case, threw in a couple Gerber Grabbers for Emma's lunch, prepared a bottle for later, grabbed leftover mac n cheese for Hunter's lunch, his water, changes of clothes for each kid, my phone, car keys, and buckled the kids in their car seats. The drive to Sunnyvale from Fremont is about 30 mins, and I usually play "Elmo Song" or "More Elmo song!" for Hunter since that's all he ever asks for, but today he asked for "Mommy's song!" So I put the CD I own of my songs I have written and recorded over the past 7 years. Each song has a very special meaning to me, and was inspired by events in my life, or emotions I went through at a season of my youth and because I attribute emotion with music, hearing songs again usually bring up the emotions I felt at the time of writing them.

A song I wrote after my brother's return from Iraq came on. That song is extremely emotional for me because it is a mourning for the small child like innocent brother I knew growing up as I see this new war hardened man before me. I was immersed in the song as I drove down 237 when I heard Hunter AND Emma chiming into my consciousness like little bells.. They were singing whole heartedly and with abandon to my song...MY song! My children....little beings that I created with my husband in love were now enjoying and singing a song that was already very emotional for me, but now this new layer of JOY was painted over this song of grief that I had written many years ago. It was poetic and beautiful and I wept as I drove down the highway. I wept because I was so happy to see my children enjoying something that meant so much to me, and because of the new memory I could tie to that song.

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Today..I wrote my Congressman.

After reading this article today...

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2013/oct/8/shutdown-leaves-families-killed-soldiers-no-funera/

I could not remain silent. I cried. I cried for all of the families who not only have to suffer the loss of their loved ones, but who now suffer further pain because of this Government shutdown. I wrote the following letter to my local Congressman. I don't know if he will even read it...or how much good it will actually do, but short of storming the castle this is as much as I can do right now as a voter.

Here is my letter:

Mr. Swalwell,

My name is Corinne Oestreich. I am 26 years old and a mother of two small children. I have been married to my husband, a combat veteran of the United States Marine Corps for over 4 years and have been a Democratic voter since 2004. I am beyond heart broken at recent events in our Government. I am a supporter of the Affordable Care act. I understand its importance, and I understand the problems the Act has and agree it needs some reform at a future time. I can see where Tea Party Republicans are upset and desire change but I cannot understand why Tea Party Republicans who claim to be avid supporters of our Military and their families condone and allow this Government shutdown to continue when it results in families of our fallen Marines and Soldiers denied their Grievance pay. I am in tears. A very very close and dear friend of mine lost her husband in Aug 2011 in Afghanistan. I remember having to watch her suffer the loss of her husband while she was 5 months pregnant with two other  small boys under the age of 4. It was a very very hard time for her, and she depended upon that pay after her husband passed to get all of his funeral things in order. She was able to afford her flight to see his body carried off the airplane upon landing back in his country. She was able to have at least some ease on her mind that financially she would be supported as she sorted out how her new life would go. This Government shutdown is HURTING Americans...hurting our military families in their time of pain and when they need our support most of all. Not only are our hero's families forgotten in this time, but families who depend on WIC to feed their babies, or even our Veterans who depend on the GI bill to pay for school, or active military who rely on tuition assistance. I can't help crying at how wrong this all is. It makes me angry to know that members of Congress are protected financially by the 27th amendment when our Gold Star military families suffer not only emotional loss but also the pay that is needed to get them stability in their time of grief. Please. I cannot beg you enough. Please represent me, my family, and the friends close to my heart who have lost loved ones over seas. Tell Congress to end this government shutdown NOW. I can tell you one thing, if action is not taken immediately I will not be voting in any constituents in the next election.

Sincerely,
A concerned Combat Veteran's wife,

Corinne Oestreich

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A little slice of Heaven

Jason stayed home from work today. He wasn't feeling too great and hung out on the couch for most of the day being crawled on by babies. I got a LOT of cleaning done however because he was able to keep the kids occupied. Tonight after I put Emma to bed around 7:30 (she was exhausted now that she crawls all over), Jason started a fire in the fireplace. It was a chilly day and we both commented about how it smelled like fall outside. I tucked Emma into her crib, and snuck out to the den where Hunter and daddy were cuddled up watching Micky and whispered "Hey guys!! Come here!" and they snuck over into the livingroom where the fire was, and together the three of us snuggled on the couch watching the fire burn. It was a precious moment that I want burned (pun intended) into my memory forever. Hunter was still, and not wiggly, and Jason had his arm protectively around both of us. It felt like Heaven. This was my family! It was a sweet time for Jason and I to give Hunter that special attention he needed. Hunter had one hand in daddy's and one hand in mine and kept giggling at us. We told him how much we loved him, and even snuck a few kisses while Hunter told us what colors her saw in the fire. We determined that every color of the rainbow was in the fire. :) What a special start to Fall!

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The Adventures of Hunter's Airplane

A week ago, before Jason left for work, Hunter came running up to him with his toy airplane. He didn't want daddy to leave for work after a morning of playing and wanted daddy to take his toy airplane to work with him. Jason laughed and said "Ok buddy..I'll bring him with me to work today and he can be my helper." Hunter laughed and said "Ok!". Our day after Daddy left for work was pretty normal, diaper changes, walk to the park etc, and then I started to get the pictures from Jason. Pictures of Hunter's Airplane helping him at work!! I showed Hunter the pictures and Hunter started laughing and laughing! He thought it was the coolest thing that his airplane was with daddy!! Jason was so creative and even made a device that spun so the airplane could fly at his work. Its something that Hunter still talks about..the day his airplane went to work with daddy.

 

Airplane supervising the other workers. "Hmm yes...good job."

"Nice welds Eric"

 

"Hey!! I'm flying!!"

 "Ready for take off..today was great."

Soon to come...The Adventures of "Jessie" at daddy's work. ;)

 

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Morning Glories in my wake...

When I was a little girl, I had a bedroom in the back of my parents house that faced the back yard. My window looked into the garden my mom had worked tirelessly every spring to prune and weed into a jewel sprinkled rainbow of flowers. One of my favorite morning sights as a young girl was to see the blue and purple morning glories that she planted, bloom as they wrapped around my bedroom window. I always thought it was fascinating how they would close up at night and unfurl themselves each morning as the sun and dew hit their petals. Morning Glories for me became a joyous reminder of my childhood, and the peace I would feel safe in my bed each morning as I gazed out my window to see their blue and purple glory.

As I am now an adult, with my own family, and my own home, I have decided to plant morning glories. I planted them in the flower pot in my front yard, and plan on attaching a trellace for them to climb and wrap themselves wildly along the front of the house. Even though we will not be in this house forever, I feel like it would be my way of leaving a new memory for whomever rents this house next. Maybe it will bring a happy memory for whatever little girl can wake up seeing them bloom, that maybe Emma will attribute them to happy times from her own childhood...or Hunter for that matter.

Here is my flower pot now... they are growing slowly..but the snails and slugs have been fighting me for their leaves.

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Confessions of a "Stay at Home" Mom.

I know every mom has days like today. Days where you look up at the sky/whatever God you pray to, and chant your mantra "I am grateful for my kids, I am grateful for my kids. I am doing a great and wonderful thing by staying home with them." all whilst your two and a half year old screams and kicks the hardwood floor because you wouldn't let him watch "Dinosaurs" for the 3rd time today, and your 7 month old has bitten your shoulder, while stirring the rice that has now burned to the bottom of the pan on the stove. Oh and then your phone rings.. good luck with that. I have small milestones that I look forward to on hard days to get me through.. things like turning the coffee maker on at 8am when I've gotten up with Emma, and the smell of the freshly brewed coffee splashes into my cup, or 4pm, when we go for our afternoon walk in the stroller to the elementary school park down the road and I let Hunter run around the campus and play on the playground. If we still live here in 2 years I want him to be familiar with the elementary school he will go to. :)

Today was rough. I feel like Hunter hears me ask him to do something and thinks "Oh mom's voice isn't too mad yet, I guess I can keep not listening to her." Then when I yell he finally goes "OH!! Sorry!!" and then does it. I would like for him to listen to me before it gets to that point. :/ 8 o clock came and I found myself on craigslist, browsing through part time office positions.. I wasn't seriously looking, but I was fantasizing what it would be like to be in an office again, with people my own age, having adult conversations (well not ADULT conversations but you know what I mean.) Sometimes the mommies at the playground weird me out, its hard to make friends and have conversations with them. This mom of twin 18 month olds was at the park today and she let her toddler wander right up to the road... I was like "uhhhhh." and watching the street ready to run after him if she didn't. Her friend was a boho chic organic vegan purist dressed in something I'm sure was woven in hemp. It was hard to take her seriously as she explained that her daughter was only allowed to eat food from unprocessed plants who had died prior to being plucked from the earth. (Insert raised eyebrows and crickets) To each her own I guess, as I stuffed Hunter's mouth with a doritos chip and wiped the cheese on my own shirt.

Anyways.. I'm not sure where I'm going with this post except that today was rough, I miss being a working adult who interacts with other adults on a daily basis, and the kisses from Hunter and Emma at bed time made the whole day worth it...however if I had wine in the house you BET I would have poured a glass... Goodnight.

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A full nights rest

Jason and I spent Saturday night at the Hilton Garden Inn in Mountain View. It was a mini vacation, but it was so wonderful to really spend one on one time with my husband. We got to the hotel, and I was able to take some pictures of our huge room! :)

 

Jason and I showered and got ready for our nummy dinner we had reservations for at 6:30. I was actually able to shower without guilt and then straighten my hair and do makeup while groovin to my Pandora music. It was so relaxing! After we got ready, we headed out hand in hand to the restaurant. We had Lamb riblets tossed with terryaki sauce and sesame sead, garlic chips and onions as an appetizer. Then thr brought out a little food shot of crab, avocado and cucumber to "cleanse the palate" You know when they say that phrase that the bill is going to be astronomical. I ordered the Fillet Mignon and Jason had the 20oz Prime Rib and we shared sauteed mushroom and creamy spinach as sides. I had a lovely Figge Merlot with my steak, and Jason enjoyed a German beer. After our main course they brought out a shot size of Raspberry sherbert on a mint leaf and following that a complimentary desert with "Happy 4th Anniversary" written in chocolate!! Oh and two chilled glasses of Moscato! Then they brought out cotton candy, an adorable tradition started years ago at the restaurant. 

 

Jason and I finished off this wonderful night with red wine that my dear friend Laurie had sent to our room, and a trip to the hot tub! 

I slept the entire night and was able to turn off my "mommy ears" that are constantly listening for crying children. The elevator ride up form the pool we shared with a young mother and a very sleepy looking 6 month old baby. I smiled at the baby and mother, thinking about my babies who were snuggled in their beds and then allowed myself to put the motherly longing aside and just be with my husband, walk into our room, and enjoy this one night without them. When I came home today, Hunter gave me a huge hug and showed me all of his new dinosaurs that Grandma had bought him. Emma was super snuggly and I just LOVED being back with them. I missed them, but I had such a wonderful time with my hubby. :) 

 

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4 amazing years...

The 21st of this month marks Jason and my 4 year anniversary. It has been a crazy rough and tumble 4 years that have brought us stronger in our love and given us two beautiful children.

Let me give my readers a very quick overview of our marriage so far..

Jason and I met in 2007, when he and my brother were in the Marine Corps together as roommates. It started out very casual. We were both with other people at the time, so we were just friends, maybe with some flirting here and there. There were a lot of "Say Hi to your sister for me!"s while I was on the phone with my brother. When Jason and Andrew came home from Iraq, I was at the homecoming. We walked to the barracks with my brother to unload his bags and out stumbles my future husband, at 9am, with a bud light in his hand. "CORINNE!!! Its JASON!" I raised an eyebrow at his swaying figure. He was in blue jeans and no shirt, his feet were bare. The man was obviously enjoying his homecoming celebration with his buddies and I laughed before he said "Oestreich!" Ooohhh Jason Oestreich.. that's right. Hi. He said "Nice to see you!" and then walked back into his room. Sometimes I wish I could travel back in time to that very moment so I can whisper in my ear "THERE STANDS YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND!" hahaha!

A couple boyfriends, and a broken engagement later, Jason and I realized that we wanted to be more than friends. When my ex and I broke up, Jason swooped in and was everything my ex was not. We dated for 2 months and Jason proposed to me. Some would say that the way he proposed to me was not "Romantic", it  wasn't "Marry Me" written in the sand on a beach, and it wasn't a treasure hunt into the woods to a candle lit cabin. It was REAL, and it was romantic to me. :) We were staying at the Motel 6 during one of my visit to 29 palms, and he had lit the room with white tea lights. I opened the door and was so surprised. He had red wine, and we poured them with smiles on our faces into the plastic cups the hotel provides. We made love, and I walked into the bathroom. When I came out, I found Jason on one knee with a diamond ring in his hand. He smiled and said "Corinne Patricia? Will you marry me?" and I giggled like a silly girl and said yes!! :) It is one of my favorite memories of Jason. We tease each other about that night sometimes because when we say it out loud it sounds ridiculous, engaged in a Motel 6 with plastic wine cups... but it was so so romantic.

We married in my parents garden in their back yard in a very private ceremony and even attached a webcam so that Jason's family in MN could see the ceremony. My very best friend Jeff Decker was there, along with the rest of my family.

 

Our first year of marriage was spent mostly separated. Jason was in Afghanistan and I spent my time gathering furniture for our first house on base in 29 palms. In the following years we really worked on our communication skills and also on our compromise. I learned to compromise for him, and he learned to compromise for me. We learned what a true apology was and how to allow yourself to be wrong. We have two amazing children, and now we are excited to spend our first night together away from our children. My mom will be watching the kids overnight. (I can't tell you how excited I am to be able to turn off my mommy ears and actually slip into a deep sleep!) 

We are staying at the Hilton Garden Hotel and eating at a very nice Steakhouse called Alexander's Steakhouse. SOOOO excited!!!!!!

Today I got my anniversary gift in the mail. It was in a large box from one of my favorite gift stores!! Red Envelope...

 

I couldnt wait to open in and when I did, I knew my husband had surpassed expectations. He didnt just get a piece of jewelry (though I would NEVER complain about that hehe) be got us a personalized picnic backpack that comes with all the utensils and plates and even a wine cooling side sack!!! I can bring my chilled Moscato on our picnic hike!! I couldn't believe it! Jason is so gosh darned romantic, it makes my tummy bubbly and happy!  All that being said, Happy 4 years to my incredible amazing, loving, selfless husband. I love you Jason. 

 

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Faith and God as I see them..

After many years of spiritual growth and learning I have come to a very comfortable and pleasant understanding of God, and Faith in general that I would like to share.

I believe that we existed before we came to earth as souls. I believe that as souls, we were intelligent beings who interacted and decided to come to earth to further our knowledge and experience. I feel that before we came to earth we decided certain challenges for ourselves that we believed could help us to learn or overcome those challenges. Every challenge in our life, be it the loss of a child, or husband, or the struggle with addiction, or mental illness or even something as simple as body image are all challenges we decided to put ourselves through on this earth. We decided who we wanted to be our family, and our support system in the spiritual world to guide us. I believe that we might have come to earth more than once, (this explains in my eyes why there are 9 year olds more mature than some 30 year olds I know.) I believe that God is neither male nor female. That God is ALL loving. That God loves EVERYONE...this includes murderers, rapists, and thieves. We are ALL God's children, and how could a loving parent ever shun or disgrace their child? I believe that all souls, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, Jew, Atheist, will all be together again after death. That our intelligence will only be furthered and our understanding of a bigger picture will come in the next life.

I have a belief in Jesus Christ, as a human. I believe him to be imperfect on this earth, to have suffered loss and felt pain. I believe he is the son of God, and that he was sent to this earth to pay the debt of his brother and sisters sins. I am a sinner. I am imperfect.

I believe that God gave me a brain to think and question for myself what is and what is not true in this world. I do not believe in one true church over all the others. I believe there is good in every religion and I pull from each religion what my soul understands to be true. I have a strong belief in Karma, in that what good you put in this world will be reciprocated to you if not in this life, in the next. I believe that that good will only be valid if done from a loving place in your heart. (ie: bringing cookies to a homeless shelter with a snarky sneer on your face as you judge them for their life's decisions will not count.)

I'm not trying to preach to anyone, I am simply writing out my own beliefs as I have come to understand and feel them in my heart. I strive to act in love towards EVERY person I meet. As Christ says in Matthew 25:40....

 "And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

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Loving him because he is imperfect.

The other day I posted a status on Facebook about my husband Jason. It read as follows..

"I am so incredibly lucky to have Jason Oestreich as my husband. I NEVER have to ask him to wash dishes, or take out the trash, because he does it before I even notice it needs to be cleaned. He is supportive, loving, hilarious, and now more than ever we have our communication skills honed. He even takes the kids in the early morning so I can sleep in a few hours extra after being up with them at night, and he does this almost every morning. He texts me all day just to ask how we are doing at home, and encourages me to go out with friends. You guys.. I am SO incredibly blessed. I just can't love him enough.. I am so lucky."

It is so incredible to me as each day goes by how I am falling in love with my husband all over again. I've decided that love is cyclical, flowing in the shape of a spiral. There are times when it twists up, when I hug him a little tighter, for no reason, or smell him and don't want to say good bye as he leaves for work, and then there are times when it tips down, where I am so busy that I hardly have time to put his needs on my brain. But I continue to love him.  

Today he picked up an order from Chipotle for us to eat for lunch and as I rattled off how I wanted my burrito bowl, he laughed and went to get a pen and paper. "Your orders are always so complicated!" he said. I recoiled, no they're not! I fed the kids, and began cleaning the house and he came home at 1:30pm, just enough time to drop off my food, give Hunter and Emma a kiss goodbye (me too) and leave for work. I sat down after feeding Emma to eat my own lunch and realized he got the wrong salsa. (Gah! Seriously?! He wrote it down!) Then my brain went "Whoa.... slow down hormonal crazy person... not only did he get you an awesome lunch.. he also put three things on it that you FORGOT to tell him you wanted..eh? You wanna try and calm down now?? Seriously.. just be glad he wasn't here for this ridiculous display of ungratefulness." Thanks brain.. thanks for the reality check.  I am constantly catching myself complaining in my thoughts about stupid little things that are NOT EVEN CLOSE to being worth complaining about. 

I am finding that I love him more intensely, more completely today than I loved him on our wedding day. Seeing him as a father, and as a provider is the sexiest thing I have ever seen on him. Oh that and blue jeans and no shirt...wow! Hahahaha ok... I'll stop.

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My American Idol experience

I wasn't going to audition. In fact I had always swore never to audition for American Idol because I thought it was a joke. If I was going to become a singer as my career I was going to pursue it the right way, not through reality TV. This year Jason convinced me (took him 4 years before he pulled the "do it for our family" card.) to audition. I decided to sing Hell on Heels by the Pistol Annies. Registration Day was Monday (yesterday), and I got there at 5am. They divided us into sections and we all sat around. I stood next to a very nice hippie girl why had dread locks, and a Ukulele singing a song she wrote about murdering her love's gf so he could love her. (Uhhhh.) the cameras where everywhere. It instantly reminded me of LA again. The camera men were shallow attention seekers. "What's your sob story?" "Who traveled the farthest?!" "Hey give us a preview of your audition song!" Then when the person sang and most of the time, sounded ill prepared, they salivated at the mouth. "Yessss! The reality TV jackpot." It was hard for me to step out of my comfort zone. I would have needed to be quirky, or traveled from a far away place in order to get them to interview me, and I was NOT about to make a fool of myself on television. I stood quietly with an entertained smile while 4 times the people I was talking with we're pulled away for camera interviews. I wasn't discouraged, it was reality TV. I was there to sing, and I was beginning to understand that would be my downfall.

Audition day came an they corralled us into the front area of AT&T park. I met a lively mother an daughter from Minneapolis MN and honestly connected more with the mother. They filmed us screaming and yelling in excitement to Ryan Seacrest with his "THIS...is American Idol." Speech. Then they funneled us into the stands. I sat beside a girl who knew my family in Fallon NV, and talked about them for a while (small world), an then we all stood in a long line on the field, waiting to approach a booth to sing for two producers. Over the day, veteran auditioners mentioned that certain booths were looking for certain contestants to pass through. Some booths were looking for real singers, some were looking for train wrecks that would make good TV, some were automatically passing those that had already been interviewed by a camera. I approached the booth with my three other group members and we listened to the group in front of us finish. Singer1 was amazing, singer 2 was even better, 3 and 4 were terrible. I knew in my head, they're gunna cut 3 and 4 for sure. They ended up cutting 1 and 2!!! I realized, oh no..I'm at the train wreck booth. They're only gunna pass people who make entertaining dramatic reality television!! I relaxed inside, saying to myself "oh well, sing it out and give it your all! Give this songs glory to God." So I did. I sang my heart out and it was probably the best audition I've ever had. I was confident, my notes were spot on, and the SF police officers standing behind my table stopped their conversation to watch me and bob their heads, then clap. I felt awesome. I knew I did well, but I knew what was coming. I could tell as they discussed behind their clip boards that it was coming. They called the three of us up, who sang great, and said "Thank you for your audition, you are all talented but not what we are looking for in contestants at this time." And there it was.. My audition. I was so proud of myself! I didn't pass the first audition but I knew that it wasn't because my singing was terrible. I could see the LA/Hollywood process of it all. I didn't miss that from living in LA. 

It was so much fun, but now that its over I can really focus on getting excited for my upcoming surrogacy!! I have a couple that I am 90% sure I will be working with who are Dutch Indonesian!! I'm super excited to meet them and begin the next exciting chapter of my amazing life.   

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Washing windows and falling in love.

When I was young my family took me on lots of road trips. We would drive to Yellowstone, from PA to CA, Canada, and to Fallon NV every summer. We drove thousands and thousands of miles, and during those trips our windshield would get very very dirty. When we stopped for gas, as we often needed to, my Grandpa or my father would step out of the car, and pay for gas. He would stand beside the pump as it began to fill our car with the steam we needed to get us the next 300 or so miles. I remember sitting in the back seat of the car, sometimes sweaty from being awoken from a nap by the sudden lack of movement, and seeing my father grab the squeegee from the soapy water they provide, and wash the bugs off the windshield while the gas filled our car. It was a careful meticulous act. Taking more time to scrub at the bugs, and only reaching halfway across the windshield. Then he would flip it over and draw the rubber across the glass revealing a clean and glistening windshield. I always felt hypnotized while I watched him do this.. I watched him walk around and finish the other side, and sometimes he would wash the back windows, making silly faces at me while I pretended to point out spots he missed. (Classic, I always did it, and he always acted as if I were hilarious for pretending to point out his missed spots.) The act of cleaning our windows was something I attached to my love for my father and Grandpa. They cleaned the windows without being asked because it needed to be done to keep the family in the car safe. 

When Jason and I got married, we piled all of my stuff into the back of his truck, and drove from Sunnyvale CA to Twentynine Palms. I was nervous, we had never lived together, were driving to a military base where we would be staying with friends until he deployed to Afghanistan, and I was now a WIFE! Our truck was pretty gross when we reached a gas station outside of LA. I had my bare feet up on the dashboard and the windows down. (The AC was broken.) Jason stepped out of the truck and paid for the gas, he placed the pump into the gas tank and headed for the squeegee. I smiled to myself. He began to squeegee the windshield, take extra time with the bugs he found, and then flipped the squeegee over to drag the rubber across the glass. I smiled so widely as I let this new moment seep into my memory. He was washing our windshield, without having been asked, because he cared about me in his truck. I giggled as I pointed out places he missed with my toes.

For me, washing the windshield of the car will always mean "I love you". I thought of that today as Jason pumped our gas on our way to Roaring Camp to see the trains. I thought of how much I loved him the day we drove down to Twenty Nine palms, and the many times he had cleaned our windshield since. I cherish those moments, when I remember the love and peace of the simple act as acted by my dad and grandpa, and how I now love my husband as he cleans our windows.. So silly, but love is silly isn't it?

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